Addiction

I can picture myself at the meeting. It would go something like this.

Me: Hi, I'm Lisa and I'm a....bookaholic.

Everyone: Hi Lisa.

It's true. As with most addictions I choose to ignore it, just hope it will go away and then the desire hits me again; like yesterday when I was driving through a county seat, a small town of an adjacent county...you know...the kind with a court house square, charming, to have lunch with a friend. It was only a small storefront, but they had one of those easel type sidewalk signs, plus the windows were painted advertising a sale...20% off all children's. That did it.

Yes, I did it. I bought books. At least I only spent around $6.00, and they weren't even children's, and they were paperbacks, and they weren't antiquarian (love that word) or rare.

No. 1: 84 Charring Cross Road (didn't even know it was a book and didn't know it was true)...wonderful. The movie is great. See it if you haven't. I happened upon it because I love Anthony Hopkins, and of course Ann Bancroft is fabulous......and OF COURSE.....it's a sort of love story between a writer and someone who.....I won't tell you....just see it and you'll understand why. I can't say more. The thought of it is making me have the urge again.

No. 2: Boy. This one is a memoir written by Roald Dahl.

I'm worried. Not only does this addiction continue, but lately I've been buying books about books and books about writing books, and books about bookstores and books about libraries.

As I wrote my check, I asked the owner if he wanted my driver's license. His reply was "No thanks, I already have one." Then he asked me if I had seen the movie (84 Charring Cross Road) and purged all sorts of information about it; followed by more information about Roald Dahl which was that he died not long ago (I knew that) and that he had been married (at least at one time) to the actress Patricia Neal (I didn't know that). In my mind I gasped..."He's an addict too. And he WORKS here...how can he manage?" At one time while browsing I realized I didn't have cash, only a credit/debit card or a checkbook, so I asked what they took, and all he said was "We'll do just about anything to sell a book." and left it at that. I didn't know exactly what that meant...would he trade for my watch, some earrings, some velamints?

Just for today........

Reading Tastes

I guess you could call me eclectic when it comes to what I read. First, I don't have as much time to read during the school year as I do during the summer, but I do make sure I am reading something all the time.

I read a wide variety of things. Whether this is normal or not, I don't know. First of all, I read a lot of picture books. I collect picture books, old and new, and hope one day to have those to share with grandchildren or just to pull out and enjoy myself. I know some of the books I have held onto meant a lot to my girls when they were growing up. It's funny how a book, like music, can send a person zooming back to a certain time, place or event...association.

I also read, and enjoy doing so, professional books. They just keep publishing them. I wish they would stop, but that wouldn't be good. There is always something new to learn as a teacher. I particularly have a passion for professional books about literacy...anything reading and writing. I have a number I have purchased but haven't yet read. Like fiction, I just can't keep up.

When reading as an adult, I think I have rather quirky tastes. For one thing, I don't mind reading stories that my husband would call "depressing" meaning that they have sad parts. Sometimes they don't even end happily. I like these types of reads because I believe they have things to teach me. For instance, I loved reading Angela's Ashes and Teacher Man. I love stories about people who were born into adverse circumstances and yet made it, likely because of those very circumstances which made them strong.

Every once in awhile I discover a particular author and stick with him or her. When on a trip during my 25th wedding anniversary, the condo we rented had a few novels of Joyce Carol Oates sitting around. I started in on one of those which led me to another and another. I still have a lot of hers I could pick up. She is extremely prolific, and I have to say when I saw a picture of her on the flap of one of her novels, she looked exhausted. No wonder. If anyone was to ask me what her novels are about, I really wouldn't know how to answer. So I guess I like fiction that doesn't necessarily fall into a particular category like romance (blech) or mystery.

The other day my daughter posted a comment on Facebook that she had met Colum McCann and that was very strange because I just bought Let The Great World Spin. I started it a few weeks ago and then put it down for lack of time. What I read did intrigue me and my daughter's comment reminded me to pick it up again. On the surface it is about a tightrope walker who walked between the twin towers in 1974. It's about a lot more than that of course. I don't always read off the New York Times or any bestseller list. In fact I prefer not to do that. I've never read Dan Brown.

I like memoir and biography. Even though I said I don't usually read the latest fad, I did recently buy a few Jodi Picoult books because they were on that table with the signage buy two get one free. I read her first but haven't read another. Everyone is reading them, but not me. I suppose I'll get around to them but since they are a bit of a fad I'm not all that interested. I'm not trying to be a literary snob; it's just how I feel. I'd never judge anyone for what they are reading.

On occasion I don't want to read what is a great piece of literature. My sister and I took a trip a year ago to Amish country in northern Indiana. It was a quiet, peaceful, and fun getaway. I picked up a trilogy by a not well known and not famous author who writes simple stories about the Amish life. They are sort of Amish romances I guess, and I actually have enjoyed those, although I certainly won't continue to read that author. There was something about them that made me appreciate the simple things and they were very relaxing to read. They made me want to be "plain."

I also like books about animals, most recently the one about the library cat and the one about Marley. We all know how those are going to end, but I read them anyway. Of course as a child there was My Friend Flicka, Black Beauty and National Velvet.

I grew up going to the library almost weekly and bringing home much more than I could ever read. Now I do that when I go to a bookstore, an expensive habit but one I don't feel guilty about. I must admit I don't visit the library the way I used to. Libraries aren't the same anyway. I like the old ones, with hardwood floors and rooms that echo with your footsteps, and drawers you could pull out and sit on a table to search through cards for books; I like it when librarians stamp the back of your book with the return date, etc. I'm just old fashioned that way; I miss those things. I do miss smelling books. I use to love the smell of library books. Am I weird? The main reason I don't go often is that I want to see what is newly published and they aren't always available at the library. At the bookstore I can look in the sections that show recently published fiction and nonfiction, and I can see what employees recommend. I guess the library has tried to do some of that.

There is only one thing I haven't done yet, and it is something I would REALLY like to do...be invited to, or start, a book/reading club.

P.S. I collect. I have some out of print children's books. I have a volume of letters Louisa Mae Alcott and her father wrote back and forth (very rare I think), old school books, my own primers, and even some of the Little Golden Books and Elf books with which I associate some childhood memories. When I look at one of my old Little Golden Books about a drum majoriette, I can feel myself sitting on my mother's lap and I can hear her voice reading to me.

P.P.S. Some of my favorite books: Alice in Wonderland (makes me really relate to how much kids loved Harry Potter...fantasy, Little Women, Carolyn Haywood Betsy books, The Bounty Trilogy (if THAT isn't quirky for a teen to love, then what is...but I did..still do...love the story of The Bounty), Rebecca (gothic romance is just fine), Forever Amber, the Clan of the Cave Bear series, oh dear I'd better stop now.

Did I mention I love to buy interesting looking cookbooks, even though I'm not much of a cook? I'd love to hear about anyone else's reading life and interest in starting a reading group.

Too Too Much

I have been a bit "blogged" down (groan) with my posting. That is mostly because I've been working on house projects in anticipation of fall and winter.

I don't even know if we'll manage to get to the attic before it gets too cold, but Ed and I have been simultaneously attacking various parts of the house we naturally claim...mine is the den/library and his is the garage. I think I got in over my head.

I am in the process of cleaning off bookshelves...shelf by shelf. We have more than just books in our library. We have DVD's, CD's, various cords that belong with who knows what, stacks of music (written music) left from high school choirs and performances, violin music, guitar music, piano music, yearbooks from my oldest daughter Caitlin, who is 25, starting from K through high school (plus the other daughters' yearbooks), plus my and Ed's yearbooks...uh, let's see...a plastic container full of crayons and coloring books (Christmas coloring books which I refuse to throw away...go ahead and laugh...sometimes I still like to color), vinyl record albums (some of which I am sure are collectible), VCR tapes (movies and family videos), some of my mother-in-law's books (she is now residing in an assisted living facility), and some of my daughters' books too...plays, teacher books, etc., etc.

Are you overwhelmed yet? I am. As I said. I started feeling anxious by the time I was only half way through. What happens when you have that much stuff is that you don't know what to do with it. I'm not one to get rid of books, but it is time. I now have several grocery sacks, and a large plastic container of books sitting in the hall outside of the library. Ed will have to take a look at those, and so will the girls, and probably some of them will come back into the library.

I'll probably donate the paper backs and others I find of little value to the library or my school's 8th grade garage sale. There may be some that, although they no longer hold interest for us, may have value to someone else. For awhile I've thought about selling things on Amazon or Ebay. I'm not sure if it is worth the effort, but I might experiment and try a few.

Ed's area was the garage. His mother as mentioned moved to our town and is an assisted living facility, so not only do we have the aforementioned books of hers, but we have some pieces of furniture, boxes of photos, etc., some of which were in the garage....along with various other pieces of furniture from our daughters' dorms and apartments. He did take a few things to be donated today just to get them out of the garage. We haven't been able to park in one of the bays.

We have only been in this house five years this winter, and I have no idea how we could possibly have accumulated so much stuff, but I think it is from having college aged daughters, parents who are aging, and.....something that is going to stop, an addiction to books. I have a number of books I will keep, but I hereby vow to start going to the library or trading with friends.

Anyone up for a book exchange? Or better yet, forget the exchange, I don't need anymore...anyone up for a book giveaway?

Why is it that when you are watching a movie where there is a room with stacks of books and papers around, it seems so...so...quaint or artsy...like maybe in Finding Forester, but when it is your own house it doesn't feel that way?

Little Women: Its Meaning to Me

Finally, the last one. What it meant to me.

I just thought those four sisters had so much fun together. They used their imaginations. I was definitely an "imagination girl" growing up. They made it seem fun to be poor. I didn't have a lot growing up, but I had love. I didn't have a lot of things, but I had my imagination. It gave me a true appreciation for the mind. I play acted like they did. I was swept away by my dreams. I had what was called a "rag bag" (probably because that is what it was called when my mother was young). The rag bag was like a pillow case probably and it was full of old clothes, shoes, purses, and jewelry my mother was no longer using. I played dress up often with those throw aways.

We used to set up fairs in the back yard, makeshift booths of games we made up similar to ring toss, etc. We even had rides (the swing set, the slide). You paid a nickel probably for each game or ride. Then we had money to buy penny candy at the store. That's something you don't see any longer. My brothers took old bike parts and pieces of wood and built go carts which we'd ride down the alley. I could go on and on. The point is that we used our imaginations and what little resources that were on hand. We took such pleasure in simple things, as did the March girls.

I wanted to have an attic space like the March family (I sort of do today). I used to love to go into my grandma and grandpa's attic space and look through old boxes of stuff, including some navy uniforms that had belonged to my uncles and my father, a raccoon coat that had belonged to an aunt of mine, etc. My attic is a mess, but a mecca for a child who has an imagination and wants to explore. One day...when grandchildren come, I hopefully will still have it.

The March girls were a little bit old fashioned and a little bit ahead of their time. I'm a little like that. Their old fashioned way of life, wearing long dresses, making do with what they had to gather Christmas gifts for Marmee...that all appealed to the little girl me. At the same time, Marmee was ahead of her time. She pushed her girls to be independent and self-sufficient. She didn't want them to marry just to be taken care of. She wanted them to marry and be happy, whether they married someone with money to support them or not. She wanted them to be honest and have self-respect.

Finally, what can I say...I ended up having four daughters of my own. I've been a sort of Marmee I think. I hope I've taught them to appreciate the simple things. When they were small, we had a lot less than now, but more than some. I never bought them game systems or electronics. I mostly encouraged them to pretend. They had dress up clothes. I exposed them to many of the old movies and musicals. I remember when their high school put on Bye Bye Birdie, Cate and Kelly came home and were astounded that so many of their peers had never even heard of it (not that it is up there with quality musicals). We always read aloud. We made cookies, we played board games. Sometimes we had...gosh I forget what we called it...but a sort of night when we pretended we were living before electricity. They made tents using blankets over furniture, or we'd set up a tent and sleep outside in the back yard.

As they were growing up I would try to match their personality with that of Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy. They didn't fit perfectly, but it did seem that each of them shared certain characteristics of the March girls. Beth was the sensitive musician. That was Kelly, who has often told me..."Thanks mom, I'm the one who dies." Cate was Jo for her acting. Mary matched up with Amy who liked to use big words, often mispronouncing them (it's TRUE Mary), and that left Meg and Erin, who I think share some characteristics, although Erin may be a mix of different ones.

Well, you can maybe see why I've had a connection with this wonderful book. It all began with reading and becoming immersed in the lives of the March girls. I was right there with them...I felt like I was one of them. The rest just fell into place in my life.

Little Women Part 2: The Movies

I've seen all the movie versions I am aware that exist. While I adore Katherine Hepburn as Jo (1933), that isn't my favorite. The acting is too close to what you would see in a silent film for my liking.

My favorite from a classic movie perspective is the one with June Allyson as Jo (1949). She does an excellent job capturing the spirit of Jo. That film also includes Elizabeth Taylor as Amy, Margaret O’Brien as Beth and Janet Leigh as Meg.

There is a television version I recently discovered and purchased on DVD. Susan Dey played Jo, and well...it's just awful. The costuming and sets are so terrible you feel like you are watching The Brady Bunch. In fact Eve Plumb from The Brady Bunch is actually in this film, and I didn't even realize it until I paused just now to check out the year it was made. It was made in 1978 and doesn't that explain a lot.

If you watch this video you'll see what I mean. Look at the color of the walls in the bedroom at this party scene a minute or so into the clip. People just didn't paint their walls that color during the Civil War, nor would the carpet color have been that blue. In fact, I doubt if people had wall-to-wall carpeting in 1861. Susan Dey's hair pretty much looks like the way she wore it in The Partridge Family. It just has the feel of a high school production at best and if you know and love this story the way I do, this just doesn't cut it.

http://uk.video.yahoo.com/watch/1307492

My true favorite thus far (and who knows if someone will attempt a movie version again) is the most recently produced version (1994). The cast includes Winona Ryder as Jo, Kirsten Dunst as young Amy, Claire Danes as Beth, Christian Bale as Laurie, and Susan Sarandon as Marmee. I had a hard time at first accepting Claire Danes as Beth. I think it is because of her role in My So-Called Life, but I got over it. There was just something about this film that made me suspend disbelief. It made me cry. I was there.

The story has always been a holiday story to me, and the movie is now also in my collection of Christmas movies I watch each year.

The only downside of any movie adaptation of a novel of this size is that things need to be cut, things that I felt were important to the story. Unfortunately, I suppose, that is necessary unless someone in the future wants to make another Gone With the Wind.

http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi3566600473/

Next time….what this story has meant to me.

Little Women Part 1: Background

I will no doubt be writing more than one entry about how I've connected with Louisa Mae Alcott and Little Women through my life thus far. Little Women was one of my favorite books from around the age of twelve. I was introduced to this classic when my mother and father bought it for me for Christmas. That copy is long gone from overuse which isn't a bad thing, although it would be nice to have. I've owned several. I still own probably two or three different copies. First editions are nearly nonexistent and difficult to prove because copyrighting wasn't done in the same way. If I ran onto one that was a first printing or close to it, it would no doubt cost thousands of dollars.

I don't know what any of my readers may already know of Louisa and her family, but her father was a transcendentalist and they lived in Concord, Massachusetts. Orchard House is still there, is a museum, and I will visit one day. Their contemporaries were Emerson and Thoreau. If I could get one of those grants Lilly gives to teachers, I'd love to go there and study; maybe research how their lives crossed in light of the history of the time and whatnot if it hasn't already been done. Louisa's father wasn't financially successful apparently, spending most of his time studying and living his philosophy. Little Women doesn't really go into that part of their lives in great detail, but the book is very autobiographical. Everyone knows Jo is Louisa, and Louisa also had three sisters (Meg, Beth, and Amy in the book...not their real names).

Louisa was a writer already and when her publishers, Little Brown & Company, asked her to write a story for girls, she didn't want to do it. I'm glad she did. There are other books about the March family (Little Men, Jo's Boys) but they didn't capture me in the same way. She also wrote a lot of other things. Many I have yet to read, but am determined to do so. I believe she wrote the book in a relatively short period of time, sent it in, and it became an immediate success.

Like Jo in the story, Louisa wrote a lot of dramatic, mysterious types of stories, which weren't nearly the literary quality of the March family stories, and the book ends with....well, if you haven't read it, you should. I've lost count of how many times I've read it. I particularly like to pull it out around Christmas because the opening of the story takes place at Christmas with I think one of the best opening lines I've ever read, "'Christmas won't be Christmas without any presents,' grumbled Jo, lying on the rug." I suppose that is only because it holds so much meaning for me. Watch for more posts in the near future including how I experienced the book as a youngster, the movie versions, and more.

Learning to Retreat

It is officially the half way mark of our vacation, and I can see why Anne Lindbergh says in Gift from the Sea that you really don't start letting go, calming your soul, finding peace until the second week. While I am loving this place I am in, both geographically and spiritually, I can see why another week or more would bring even more of this feeling of calmness.

I think it takes a week to rid oneself of bills, laundry, work, housekeeping, and all the things that are burdensome. I do feel relaxed and calm but I can see becoming more so if there were more time to retreat.

To truly retreat I would perhaps come on my own, not blog, not check mail, not make plans. It was hard for Anne Lindbergh to let go of the same things that burden us as women especially, even in 1953. As I revisit Gift I am reminded how its wisdom crosses all generations. Decades have not changed its message and I doubt four or five more decades will either. In a way I believe it is even more difficult for us to retreat from the world, is easier to be lonely if alone, and to be challenged when withdrawing from the technology that constantly keeps us connected.

I've peeked into Gift just a bit while here. I couldn't remember if Anne used scallops as an example of one of the shells she used to inspire her writing. She did not. Scallops are everywhere on the beach and although I've picked up dozens, they continue to attract me. They are common but unique, like snowflakes I guess, or people. I find myself glancing down attracted by the variety of colors, a pale pink, orange, white, gray, or brown. I wonder where they've been, what they've experienced, how they've become who they are. Even the ones with barnacles attached are beautiful.

Most of the shell seekers on the beach are after that one prized shell, perfect and rare; I think I'd rather stick with that which is not fleeting, that which is still special no matter how common, that which has a story to tell.

An-ti-ci-PA-A-tion, It's Keepn' Me Wa-a-tin'

The lyrics of that song have more to do with the anticipation of being with a lover than going on vacation, but I am suddenly feeling that great feeling of looking forward to something, our family vacation to Sanibel/Captiva Island, Florida. We took a trip to the Tampa/Clearwater area last year and it was great, but Sanibel is one of my favorite places.

One of my favorite books, Gift from the Sea, published in 1955 (my birth year), was written by Anne Morrow Lindbergh on Captiva Island. I discovered it around ten years ago and wish I had found it much sooner.

Gift can stand alone, but if you are interested in its background, I recommend Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Her Life by Susan Hertog, published in 1999. There may well be other books about her life out there, but I sense most of the material is focused on Charles Lindbergh. I loved reading about the way Anne was raised. Her mother was consistent at reading aloud to her and three siblings. (I have three siblings and my mother also read aloud to us regularly; I likewise have four children and reading aloud was extremely important in our home. Was I not meant to learn about Anne Lindbergh?) Once they outgrew being read to, the habit of reading to themselves and also writing on a regular basis came naturally. Anne's father was a lawyer (my husband is a lawyer). They obviously grew up in a household which placed value on education and held high standards of achievement. Anne's mother was active in promoting women's education. When I discovered Gift and also read her biography, I related so much to Anne, her life, and also her struggles. Any woman friend I know who has read the book relates to it, no matter what stage of life.

The flap of the biography states that Anne was "shy and sensitive, yet rebellious and ambitious." She had her own ambition, yet struggled with being caught up in her role as wife and mother, and what was expected of her. I didn't get the feeling she resented those responsibilities, but they are labor intensive, and we all know how easy it is to set ourselves aside. Of course Charles was in the limelight and I'm sure this made it even more difficult for her. It seems not many people know that she was a writer and also an aviator. Most only know of Charles' aviation record and of course the horrible events surrounding the kidnapping and murder of their infant son.

Gift from the Sea is poetic, simple yet deep, wise; it crosses time and space.

So I think I'll pull it out to take with me, knowing that when I search for shells on the beach, Anne Morrow Lindbergh might have walked the same path. I might even find time to reread her biography.

The area is governed well. It isn't Panama City. There are building restrictions on height, so you won't find high rises. There are restrictions on shelling. No live shells may be taken, yet there are piles of shells on the beach at low tide. Being a barrier island, the area is known for shells and you'll see people in a stance (bent over looking at the ground) called the Sanibel stoop. When in the water you can find many live starfish, sanddollars, and other shells to enjoy even if you can't (and shouldn't) take them. The area is also populated by sea turtles whose nests are marked and protected by law. The fauna and foliage are interesting and beautiful. The J.N. "Ding" Darling National Wildlife Reserve is located there as well and is part of one of the largest undeveloped mangrove ecosystems in the country.

There will be eight of us. Regretfully our oldest daughter, Caitlin, is out of the country and can't join us this year; but there will be other years. My parents, who can no longer travel easily on their own, will join us (a road trip with two vehicles). We plan on relaxing, enjoying the quiet and beauty, eating good seafood, reading, writing (I intend to) and playing some Skip Bo, Scrabble, and Phase Ten....and I mustn't forget the Bloody Mary's and Margaritas.

Ahhhh....an-ti-ci-PA-A-tion......

People Are Never What You Think

I just finished reading a biography of Stephen King, Haunted Heart, written by Lisa Rogak. I really only picked it up because I'm participating in my library's adult summer reading program which involves following a bingo list of various genres. It is managing to stretch me as a reader.

I was a huge fan back in the day of Carrie and The Shining, but fell away as King's novels became more gruesome and less "ghost story" to me. King is nothing like I, or my friends who were also fans, thought. We assumed he had to be a bit twisted to come up with his stories, and he sure looks that way; I discovered he has pretty much been labeled that way. After you read this biography his appearance becomes that of a gangly, goofy, and nerdy type of guy...a regular guy; he just happened to love horror films starting with the 50's classics and was writing stories for his classmates and his mother (who paid him a quarter for each one) at a very young age.

Except for the fact that his father literally went to the store to buy a pack of cigarettes and never came back, and aside from the fact that he did struggle with addiction for many years, he could live next door to you. As far as his writing goes, my inference after reading the bio is that he struggled a bit with not being as accepted into the "literary" circles as were other authors; but it seems he eventually gained that respect at least some of the time.

He was prolific no doubt, and I remember losing respect for him when he published book after book after book. Apparently, he really was just a writer whose work just naturally poured out of him. It was his process. Achieving financial success had to have been a great thing for him and thus his wife (who is also an author), and his three kids (two of whom are writers), after the life of extreme poverty he himself endured as a youngster. There were a number of times when he appeared and was paid, and gave the money right back; or published something new, only to give the proceeds to charity. He was a dad who coached his son's baseball team, and he gave the money to build a nice place for them to play in Maine where they live (part of the time).

He has a great sense of humor even in the midst of the macabre. I think that comes out in his stories...and you have to respect his story telling ability and imagination even if you don't like horror (which by the way isn't the only thing he writes). One of the funniest moments in Haunted Heart is when he is recuperating from the accident which nearly killed him; the nurses on duty were strictly told NOT to make any Misery jokes as he lay in bed waiting for his severely damaged leg to heal.

Reading about him also reminded me of my feelings about how middle Americans aren't really heard (previous post). He was someone who protested the Vietnam War which at the time was a rebelious thing to do, yet all along he has had rather conservative values in some ways. His daughter is a lesbian, yet his conservative side obviously didn't interfere with his acceptance of her. He isn't one of those conservatives. One of my favorite things he said is in reference to God.

"The idea of using God as a character in Desperation was the engine that made the book go. While I don't see myself as God's stenographer, He's always been in my books. It depends on the people I'm writing about. So I thought, what if I treat God and the accoutrements of God with as much belief, awe, and detail as I have treated evil. Some people say the God stuff really turns them off, but these guys have had no problems with vampires, demons, golems, and werewolves in the past. I've always believed in God. I also think that the capacity to believe is the sort of thing that either comes as part of your equipment, or at some point in your life when you're in a position where you actually need help from a power greater than yourself, you simply make an agreement to believe in God because it will make your life easier and richer to believe than not to believe. So I choose to believe."

I'm now inspired to go back and try many (and there is a lot) of the things I've missed from him, as well as try some of the things his wife and sons have also produced.

http://www.stephenking.com/index.html